And so "the" holiday has passed, another Christmas done and gone. And yet, the war rages on in our hearts and minds.

I tried to do my part for the war effort.

• I held a Micky Santa hostage until he admitted his holiday cheer was chemically enhanced.
• Informed children everywhere that santa was a fraud. Not that he doesn't exist, but that his toy empire was built on the backs of the working elves.
• I chased an elderly woman down the street after she greeted me with a "Merry Christmas", I threw her into the gutter and screamed "Happy Holidays" until she wept and begged for my secular mercy. I gave none.

It is the small efforts that will help us triumph over the fruit cakes and poorly arranged Christmas songs.

As a final blow against the great seasonal tyranny, I mocked the very "spirit" of the holiday. To the dismay and horror of my friends and loved ones, I turned against the spirit of giving and gave my money to charity. No gifts labeled to or from Mark this year. To spite the very meaning of the holiday, I laughed in the face of it all and gave the money away to those selfish bastards who actually need it.

I turned the holiday on its ear and became a humanist, a damned dirty humanist. There is no place in this holiday, or this country for that matter, for humans. Mickey learned that the hard way.

But we are rising up. We are getting stronger. There are plenty of "humans" in this world that will hear our call. You can run. You can try and hide your freshly unwrapped Xbox 360s and your assortments of cheese and sausages, but it is only a matter of time. The humanists will hunt you down, and you will pay.

I collected over $839.00 for the 2004 Holiday charity, and I want to thank all who donated. I made the donations today, and I imagine none too soon with the suffering in Asia.

Two charities that I imagine could use some help right about now:

Direct Relief

Direct Relief International has worked to improve the quality of life for people in need. We focus on health - by providing essential material resources to locally run health programs in poor areas around the world and during times of disaster.

Action Against Hunger

Recognized worldwide as a leader in the fight against hunger, Action Against Hunger delivers programs in over 40 countries, specializing in emergency situations of war, conflict, and natural disasters and longer-term assistance to people in distress. Our ultimate goal is to help vulnerable populations regain their self-sufficiency for long term sustainability.

an update on the Christmas Charity front, over $653 donated so far...

Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope... and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.

-Robert F. Kennedy

You may have noticed the 'a bitterpill christmas' image to the right. You might think it safe to assume this means drunkin' rum-eggnog induced photo copied asses, and a little santa love below the mistletoe. You're not far off. I'm making an attempt to define for myself a holiday tradition where good will towards men/women means more that a drunkin' pat on the ass from a sauced up middle manager during the holiday party, I'm looking at you Jennifer.

...this is a start of a new tradition for me. A way to define a spirit of holiday where I strive for compassion and selflessness, where I attempt to turn away from the ideals of consumption and consumerism and towards a sense of hope and humanity.

a bitterpill christmas